Rear ended on Tuesday, I’ve been waiting for enterprise to have a car available for me. A few service associates and some disregard later, I finally got a car.
“Ms. Wood… we have a car for you this evening (Wednesday), but we close at 6pm.”
The nuance here is that they called me at 545pm. I needed to go into enterprise this morning because I preferred my charges be put on another card that I didn’t have with me at the time I picked up the car. I had arranged to do this so they had notice. After some other hiccups that I remained friendly through, I had a feeling they’d pretend they’d never seen me before, so I walked softly and got out my “big stick”. My ‘you’re gonna see me coming from a mile away, don’t care, and I’m not interested in your shit lipstick’. I know what you’re thinking -“what a snot” but stay with me a while longer. Anyone who knows me, knows that my every day color is whatever blends the best into society. I really don’t like to be noticed, I just like to be around. That, and I’m often a pushover because I’m over-empathetic. My girlfriend Maria doesn’t say that I “paint the town beige” for nothing. (That always makes me laugh)
But today! Today I wore PRETENTIOUS with a purpose. I walked in the office, 2 heads turned and a 3rd asked what I could be helped with. A lady from the back said “good morning… Ms Wood, right?” Yes! Good morning to you. They switched over my payment method and as I was standing there I thought well, what the hell –
“excuse me sir but, the car I received yesterday has a stench of stale cigarettes and cheap potpourri in an attempt to mask it. It’s unpleasant. Without mentioning anything to my kids, they said the same this morning as I was taking them to school and I’d like a different car.”
With no stuttering or wasted time, off he sent me to sniff out a couple others and I drove off in one I thought wouldn’t make me nauseous. Normally I would have just swallowed it but I just didn’t care. I was done playing nice and being patient for their convenience. Think that metaphorical big stick didn’t make a difference? I beg to differ. I was not unpleasant. I wasn’t rude. I wasn’t unfriendly and I definitely wasn’t shoved off. Sally Field says in Steel Magnolias “momma always said an ounce of pretension is worth a pound of manure”. While that’s true, pretension has its place. My lipstick color served me well this morning. It’s a fun read so check out They Say Your Lipstick Color Speaks VOLUMES…” .
This lipstick made ME feel footloose and fancy free and there’s no doubt I gave off that energy. So go ahead and try it! Put on an outlandish color or grab pretentious for yourself! and go be an authentic BOSS to get your shit taken care of. Sounds kind of diva like but it’s o.k… we make up for it in other areas; and I don’t pull it out until I think its necessary *kiss kiss*